Father Gavril Galev: Indeed, if we do not forgive the mistakes (transgressions) and debts of our fellow man, God will not forgive us
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In essence, we are all debtors to our God, the Creator and Saviour. He is our Lord, and we are His people. We have all sinned and we are still sinning, we dwell in our sins, and it is difficult for us to correct ourselves. This is our debt to God, which is not small and cannot be redeemed by anything, other than the grace of God.
According to this gospel event (Matthew 18: 23-33), after the master asked for the repayment of the debt, and the debtor could not repay it, he put him in prison in order to pay back everything that he owed him. But because he could not repay his debt, he sweet-talked and begged him, and then the master had mercy on him and forgave his sins. Thus God, after our prayers, diligence and hard work, and above all, because of His great mercy, forgives our sins and we are free.
But on the other hand, we are unjust when we do not forgive the debts of others, which are disproportionately lesser than our debts to God. We are all fallen, we sin and we are slaves to sin, and in that we are all the same. We hurt each other, primarily because of our pride and self-love. We hurt each other because we love ourselves more than others, and being proud, when someone says something that hurts us and seems to be pointed against us, in fact it does not hurt us, but it hurts our vanity. We take it as a transgression against us, we lose our love, our mind becomes darkened, we close ourselves, we suffer and in this is the pain and the tragedy of the humanity – because we have identified (associated) ourselves with our painful passions and wrong desires.
Indeed in this life, for our own good, we should ask for forgiveness. God Himself emphasises that we should ask, and give, forgiveness, but that, it should be done from the heart. If it is not given from the heart, then it is a lie, in a way it is a two-faced pretence, an attempt to deceive God, but in fact we are the ones who are deceived. Just like the man who did not want to forgive his friend the debt of only hundred denars, which was a very small amount of money in comparison to his debt of ten thousand talents that his master forgave him. His friends, who are in fact the holy angels of God, saw this and told the Lord. This means that nothing can be hidden on this earth, because God looks deep into our hearts.
Let us emphasise once again that if we do not sincerely forgive our brother, neither will God forgive us. We can hide wrong things from the law, from our brother, sister, parents, from our spiritual father, but we cannot hide anything from God and because of that we will be judged and condemned if we do not forgive. We will be justified only if we sincerely forgive the sins of our fellow man (neighbour).
Indeed, if we do not forgive the mistakes and debts of our fellow man, neither will God forgive us, as we pray in the Lord’s Prayer (Our Father … forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us …). It is not a threat or a punishment, but a fundamental reaction. If we do not forgive the sin of the one who “sinned” against us, that sin of un-love and un-forgiveness (and with it always goes anger, malice, hatred …) remains in us and that is essentially our prison and darkness. For where there is no love, there is no God, but the devil, and there is no light but darkness, there is no freedom but slavery. This is the essence of our captivity. We ourselves are getting caught up by the weight of our sin and we carry it, we carry it and we carry it until we forgive the sin of our fellow man, even if that was the greatest sin, and from “our greatest enemy”. If we do not forgive, then sooner or later, it will break us.
We should care for and love one another. As the apostle Paul taught us in his hymn of love in the 13th chapter of the First Epistle to the Corinthians. Thus may we too love each other, let us always stand (take) in the last (least) place, let us not seek our own glory and will, but above all, let us live (the life of) the brother in our own heart. Then the Lord will grow in our hearts and slowly, slowly the heart will become so pure and sensitive to every movement and need of every single person. Then truly there will be no divisions, lawsuits and quarrels, which we are witnessing today, at this time, especially in our society and community.
I will give two examples that I often repeat. The first one is an example of how the devil acts where there is no forgiveness.
They were two ascetics who lived together and in great brotherly love. The devil, seeing their love and togetherness, envied them and wanted to separate them. One day the devil knocked on the door and showed himself to one of them as a dove, and to the other one as a raven, and they started arguing amongst each other whether it was a dove or a raven. They did not humble before each other and they did not want to give in and forgive each other, so they quarrelled and separated.
The second example again involves two ascetics, who also continually lived together and abided in the love of God and among themselves. Once when talking about world events, one of them said: We do not know what a quarrel is. Let us make a quarrel and see what it means for a person to argue and experience that feeling. The reason for our quarrel will be this brick. I will say it is mine, and you will say it is not yours but mine, and so we will argue.
Then the first one said: This brick is mine, the other said: It is not yours but mine, and the first one, who proposed the argument himself, said: It is not mine, it is yours, take it; and again they did not argue and stayed together, in even-greater, brotherly, mutual love.
So, quarrels originate from the devil, who, himself is evil, divisive, cursed, slanderer. That is why we should not listen to him and not serve our passions, pride and captivity of heart, but with an open heart, with a clear and pure vision that we live for the Kingdom of Heaven, and not for this earthly kingdom, to forgive our brothers, and above all, to ask forgiveness for ourselves. Do you remember that Gospel event when the Lord said: “He who is without sin among you, let him throw the first stone” (John 8,7). At the end who threw the stone? Nobody. Who was left? Only God Who is Himself the only One without sin and the sinner to whom God has forgiven her sins. So we too, if we want our sins to be forgiven, if we want to purify our hearts from the passions and free ourselves from the bondage of sin, darkness, the devil, and death, we must humble ourselves before one another, love one another, and forgive each other.
We must always look at how Christ works, and not Adam. By looking at Christ, we will reach Christ where He is. By looking at Adam we will reach Adam, wherever He goes. We should use Christ as our example.
Christ owes us nothing, yet He was crucified and suffered for our sins and our salvation. Therefore, we are actually His debtors and that is why we should forgive everyone from the bottom of our hearts and love one another. That way we will reach the Kingdom of Heaven.
Finally, God wants to teach us this lesson, that the forgiveness itself is the Kingdom of Heaven. The background of forgiveness is love, the background of un-forgiveness is anger and hatred. If we forgive, we love. If we love, we have God. The things are so simple, and the choice is ours.
First, I, the sinner ask for your forgiveness.
Amen
Fr. Gavril
Abbot of the monastery “St. Clement of Ochrid”,
Kinglake, Melbourne, Australia
